The Nature of Pair Bonding

Good and generous women will often pick terrible and conniving men and incredibly nice and loving men will often pick bitter and destructive women.

There is no point in denying the fact that this is a true and very real phenomena of the pair bonding experience. It’s a phenomena extensively observed by the time most have reached adulthood. And it’s termed a phenomena because each pair of opposites does not go out consciously knowing what it is they are doing.

The good woman really believes the man she is joining with is a great and righteous person. And likewise, the nice and loving man really believes the woman he has found himself with is incredible and worthy of worship. It’s only over time that the love blinders come off and each sees the person they are with more clearly.

What has happened is that each of the good individuals have allowed themselves to follow the will of nature. And the will of nature, even for believers, will feel far more present and real than their so called will of God; thus easily confusing one for the other, if there is, in fact, an other.

What is the cause of this? The laws of thermodynamics dictate that opposing energy states cancel each other. It also asks that what is up must come down and what is joined must eventually come apart and crumble. All this so that, in time, all return to a state of equality, equity, equanimity and chaos. Chaos is ground zero for the universe and therefore it’s default and natural state. Order, is rare and requires active reconstruction and protection in order to preserve it.

Fortunately (or unfortunately), humans have an incredible ability to store memory. And so were it not for our ability to remember, the union of these opposites would not be a “problem” and would cause far less grief and suffering than it really does. But after all, were it not for our ability to remember, a civilization would not exist and therefore these unions would have nothing to pose an existential threat on.

Knowing this now, it becomes obvious why these unions occur and why they feel so “right” to those undergoing them, as the fractal order tends to teach us of the order of things.

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